RESILIENCE

Being the Best Version of Yourself

We’re all faced with various challenges that require resilience every day.

During this time, especially while we’re still very much ‘crawling’ out of our holes, wary of the world as we knew it and anxious about a second wave… hitting a psychological wall, can feel like the end of your existence as you know it.

This modern world can be pretty difficult to navigate as it is… But throw in some degenerative deafness, continuous eye problems combined with guaranteed kidney failure into the mix… not to mention a world pandemic… and it definitely tweaks the standard hang-ups!

The trouble is, it’s only you that can find a way around it.

Here are a four techniques that I use to stay resilient.

 

1. Write it Down

 

Now it’s time to think about the wall itself. What is it that’s ripped the confidence from your soul? Write everything you’re thinking about down on paper. This helps to get it out of your head, read it out loud and to look at your own thoughts from a different perspective.

I spend a lot of time thinking about what makes me truly happy.

Outdoor activity and sports keep me sane and as soon as I feel as though I don’t want to do anything active, I know something’s wrong. The only way I can stay resilient and get back to being the best version of myself, is to fill my time with positive energy. Sports give me an enormous sense of achievement. That feeling has more value than any material item I can buy. So I think the only way to keep me going, is to know what makes me happy… truly happy… so when the wall is on the horizon and you’re heading towards it fast… write down what you have or haven’t been doing lately and read it through to yourself!

 

2.Talk

This is a difficult step for a lot of people to take.

The hardest part about this, is that talking about the issue you’re facing is accompanied by a certain amount of acceptance in the first place. Most of us will try to avoid admitting that we’re feeling vulnerable. If no-one else can even begin to understand what you’re going through, it’s very difficult to pull yourself out of the lonely whirlpool of doubt.

This is going to feel uncomfortable, but the whole point of going out of your comfort zone is to allow room to grow as a person. I love this example about lobsters in the video below.

Talking definitely helps to chop the gloomy presence of negativity in half.

By sharing your thoughts and feelings you’ll feel a weight off your shoulders and potentially realise a few things that you didn’t think about before. Although… the danger is if you’re just repeatedly venting to your closest friend, you’re not entirely dealing with the cause of the problem directly. Over time you could amplify your negativity and potentially damage a healthy friendship. Off-loading might make you feel better temporarily, but the problem isn’t over and the possibility of darkness creeping back to swallow you still lingers. As soon as you feel like someone else understands or has been through a similar situation, don’t stop there…

3. The Transformation

So you’ve got it off your chest, you feel much better… so what’s next?

Unless you take some time to think about the all important ‘WHY?’ did this happen… you may find yourself running into the same problem in the not-so-distant future. Just because you’ve vocalised your thoughts, doesn’t actually mean the cause of those negative feelings won’t make an unforeseen comeback.

Take the time to work out what the triggers were.

For me, most of the time it’s either a number of things that are beyond my control or something that may or may not happen in the future. I can now quickly identify when these anxious thoughts creep in and put them into perspective much quicker than I used to. This helps stop them from stacking up to the point where I slam into the wall.

Take some time to analyse why you reached the low point… could the triggers have been prevented, dealt with or put into perspective nearer the time?

If so… we’ve just gained the knowledge and power to stay resilient.

4. Gratitude

Find reasons to be grateful.

While we’re feeling strong and confident, I think it’s important to be aware and recognise what’s keeping you going. It’s very easy to get wrapped up in our problems again and again. No matter how bad you think your situation is, there is always something worth feeling grateful for. I think to be grateful for what we’ve got, acts as a huge contribution to our resilience. To overcome ourselves and realise the opportunities we have, to either make our own lives better or some else’s, is a really powerful tool.